Sunday, January 12, 2014

Love is the Law!

I am posting a few personal high points of last year in no particular order. Nancy


All Married

Reps. Carolyn Laine and Susan Allen
One of the biggest events of 2013 was the legalization of same-sex marriage. In Minnesota, it happened via legislators like our friend Carolyn Laine; Susan Allen, the first openly lesbian Native American legislator in the country; and Karen Clark, the first open lesbian in the Minnesota legislature. 

NanBec at MN state capitol on Love is the Law day 

Becky and I attended the jubilant ceremony at the state capitol in May when Governor Dayton signed the bill into law. Our marriage, performed in San Francisco in 2008, became valid in Minnesota on August 1, 2013. 

With the Defense of Marriage Act being struck down by the U.S. Supreme Court this summer, our marriage was suddenly also recognized by the United States government. Although these rulings give us access to hundreds of rights previously off limits, the most immediate benefit for me has been psychological and social. Being able to say "my wife" simplifies interactions in the world immensely. Whereas mentioning "my partner" usually elicited an awkward, confused, and/or disapproving silence, mentioning "my wife" often results in a smile, a heartfelt "Congratulations!" and/or a story about a gay friend or relative who just got married. People understand marriage. Suddenly I'm okay, not weird or threatening, part of the human community.

Amy Posmantur and Terry Cramer' s wedding
After Washington instituted marriage equality, we attended 2 weddings in Seattle. For our friends Amy Posmantur, a federal employee, and her partner of 31 years, Terry Cramer, marriage has significant immediate and long-term  benefits. Their July wedding with their closest friends and family members was a celebration of community and love.

Ruth Baetz, officiant Kate Thayer, and Sandra Jo Palm
We returned to Seattle in October for the wedding of Ruth Baetz and Sandra Jo Palm. They had asked us to be their witnesses at a no-fuss city hall ceremony. But the night before at a charades party in their home, they surprised us all. Wearing T-shirts from the Puget Sound Women's Peace Camp, where they fell in love almost 30 years ago, they asked their friend to marry them right there. Kate, ordained online through the Universal Life Church a few days earlier, pronounced Ruth and Sandra Jo, spouses for life. 

Reverends Nancy and Becky
Last month our neighbors asked if we knew anyone who could marry them. We offered ourselves and got ordained online in about 15 minutes. Our neighbors decided to hold off until next year, but now we can serve anyone, gay or straight, who has been waiting for marriage equality to get hitched.

And you may now call us . . . Reverend NanBec. :-)

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